Six Elements to Become Resilient

Fierce Women encompass resiliency that is an art. You will learn the six elements to becoming more resilient when you encounter trials in your life. Before we begin, I want you to calm your mind, get your notepad for some notes, and dive into the work you will need to do. Advancing in your life despite adversity or springing back after major failures all requires vision, composure, reasoning, healing, tenacity, and collaboration.

The most important element is a clear vision. Imagine that you wear glasses for a second. You have clarity, color, and can respond quickly, because you can see obstacles in your path. Now you go from frigid cold air and enter into a warm room, temperature rising, and your glasses start to fog up. You still have the vision of the room, but now it is hazy. You start tripping, so you take off your glasses and star to clean them off, but right as you do that you trip and fall and your lenses break. Placing them back on the frames are crooked and the view that was once clear as day becomes crackled and never the same. Meanwhile, your trip steered you into a different course of action. Do you see how much life can change, just through a metaphorical story of glasses?

The point of this story is that your vision must be clear enough that if obstacles and mishaps happen along the way, the vision, was large enough and detailed enough that you can find your way back. Let your small action steps be so intentional and aligned to the larger goal, that you don’t have to trip-ups.

When conflict arises in our lives, our number one negative reactor is our emotions. If you are more intentional in your daily routine and stick to a plan, there is less reactive behavior. Behavior that is irrational, is often behavior that becomes regrets. How you get through the little annoying tasks in life, show us how we respond when major things go wrong. Getting back to our rational selves is important when trying the important things in our life.

Analyzing, problem-solving, and anticipating failure. As a teacher, I am used to writing lists, routines, and agendas in my lesson plans. It’s actually a good practice to take into your everyday life because it will help you prepare a plan A, plan B, Plan C … or so on. There always needs to be a backup plan when things do go just as planned. Remain flexible in the outcomes of your journey. Be resourceful in your thinking, goal setting, and activities so that you are knowledgeable about what you’re doing. When you complete a task, always go back and reflect on how you can get better or what you can do to be successful next time.

Remain consistent. “If at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again.”-Zen Cho. You have to keep going. You have to try, be flexible, and ever-evolving. Learn from what you did wrong, and double down on what you do right. When you first start something, you are not going to be 100% perfect at it. You shouldn’t dare try to be perfect, because you will fall short every time. Set a goal about something specific that you are trying and when you go back to reflect, only look at the one thing you were trying to get better at. Expect failure so you can get better the next time.

You are meant to be around people, being social. I encourage you to socialize and learn from one another. When you have failed at something or fallen short of a goal, surround yourself with people who can encourage you but who can also teach you something. Build your networks up, so that you can bounce ideas off of other great minds. Remember there are two types of relationships that you have with people. Those who build you professionally, and then those that heal your heart emotionally. Both are important to have while you’re on a tough journey!

Your health is so important when bouncing back from a defeating moment. “Keyword: moment.” It’s your foundation, your base, or your flawlessness. You have to focus on nutrition, sleep, and daily routines. Include things in your life that bring you peace, joy, and a grounded center of self-worth, because you are more than your failures. The quality and amount of your sleep are required to be good or you will not be prepared to take on the pressures of your life. Exercising in included in this, because there are so many health benefits to keeping up your workout routines.